I Should Probably Leave Now by Andrés Hernández
This piece is about emotional detachment, being unable to feel or open yourself up completely to a new partner after being hurt by another. This, I think, is a very common phenomenon that can happen to anyone, but is very much evident and expanding in queer culture as dating apps and fast-paced lifestyles become the norm.
As an artist and as a person in general, vulnerability is a core part of my identity. It’s always been quite easy for me to tap into my emotional self, but, after experiencing emotional abuse, the last couple of months have proven to be a difficult period of time for me to access and open up about my emotions. I’ve found myself in constant fear of being rejected for showing too much of myself too quickly, or fear of giving someone else the power to hurt me again.
This piece is relevant to me because it acknowledges that, despite being aware of the risks that being vulnerable and sensitive pose in our current dating landscape, I’d rather take the pain that comes with feeling than restrain myself from feeling out of fear of pain.
About the Artist
Andrés Hernández is a queer Mexican artist and writer currently living in Tijuana. Paired with raw sexual imagery, their writing and art address attachment and impermanence. Within this juxtaposition, they revisit experiences with normalized toxicity in Mexican and queer culture, and trauma as a result of rape and emotional abuse. Their artwork and poetry have appeared in ENTROPY, Impossible Archetype, Forklift Ohio, and several other publications.
